Teen Choice '07

So the big news is that the 2007 Teen Choice Awards took place this past Sunday - August 26! Alright!!! Now, you probably did not know that this event occurred, and this is not surprising since no one who is not actually appearing on the show should be aware of its airing. However, in reading some of the post show information, there certainly were a number of surprises.

One big surprise that I noted was that Larry Birkhead was both nominated for an award and decided to attend the show. For those who have short memories (in this case it would certainly be a blessing) and felt too lazy to read very far into the article, Larry Birkhead was the answer to the most important question of this year, and maybe this entire generation: who is the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby? I mean, it certainly must have been one of the most important events of the year (coupled with the Anna Nicole Burial Saga) considering the amount of news coverage that it received. Right? Well, given this fact, obviously it was the right idea to nominate Birkhead for a Teen Choice Award. And obviously it was a swell idea for him to show up. I still have no idea what this award was and I really hope that you are in no position to inform me.

But even more surprising was that according to the same article Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, and Britney Spears all decided to pass on making appearances. Okay, maybe it would not be so surprising since there is a better than 50-50 chance that at any given time one or more of them will be in either jail or rehab, but as far as I am aware, all were ostensibly free at the time. (And by ostensibly free, I mean that all of them might have had other things that they were doing, but none sadly would have been a greater career boost than actually making an appearance at the Teen Choice Awards. And yes, this is really a very sad commentary.) But perhaps the real reason that they chose not to attend is because, as the article states, the three would likely all be nominees for the award 'Newsmakers of the Year.' That doesn't sound like such a bad award to win, does it? Oh, right, Hilton was nominated for her jail stint, Lohan for her most recent DUI, and Spears for her crazy head-shaving episode. Yes my friends, I, too, have such a low standard as to what should constitute a 'newsmaker' in the eyes of teens. Regrettably, none of the three showed up and so we will never know who the teens would have selected...

But fear not! This does not mean that the competition is over! It is the plan to enlist the services of the Committee - the group that decides on the Spears-Federline Rankings - to decide who should actually win this award. The award will be handed out in a few days, but in the meantime, feel free to send in your opinions as to who should win. Your opinions will probably be ignored.