Winehouse-Fielder-Civil Rankings - November 20, 2007

There are very few people who have not heard of Amy Winehouse and Blake Fielder-Civil. As to whether this fact is a good thing or a bad thing is up to one's own interpretation. (It's a bad thing.) But with all that has been going on in the lives of these two very talented individuals, I thought that it would be worthwhile to periodically provide updates of the current rankings of the two. So, what follows are the current rankings between the two, with short explanations given for each. First place votes appear in parentheses.

Rankings for November 20, 2007

1. Britney Spears (1) - The Committee can be counted among those few people who know very little about Winehouse and Fielder-Civil. And since the Committee was tasked with coming up with something to say in these rankings, the Committee decided to go with someone it knows for the top spot: Britney Spears. Now sure, Spears has not had the greatest performance over the last couple of weeks. She has been ordered to refrain from driving with her children in the car with her. However, she can say triumphantly that her new album, Blackout, opened at number two on the Billboard 200 charts. Way to go Britney! Oh, and she can also say that she is not Amy Winehouse. The Committee never thought it would see the day when Spears could say without any sense of irony and without being accused of hypocrisy that someone else is a total lunatic. Sure, Spears's performance at this year's MTV Awards left much to be desired, but at least she is not Amy Winehouse.

2. Amy Winehouse - Wow... Wow... The Committee was truly unaware of Winehouse's existence until maybe two months ago. Why, you might ask? Well it is because the Committee has worked so tirelessly over the months compiling the Spears-Federline Rankings that it has had little time to do anything else. The Committee just assumed that Britney Spears was the standard by which veritable insanity should be judged, and the Committee, for once, was completely mistaken. The Committee hesitates to use any adjectives to directly describe Winehouse because the Committee realizes that if it does so, it can never again ascribe these adjectives to any other person. How does one describe a person who is drug addicted, bulimic, prone to self-harm, and puts on performances such as the one described here? If you don't want to read through the entire article, just read this quote from Winehouse when people started booing her:

"Let me tell you something. First of all, if you're booing, you're a mug for buying a ticket.
"Second, to all those booing, just wait till my husband gets out of incarceration -- and I mean that."

Wow... "...just wait till my husband gets out of incarceration -- and I mean that..." One can only imagine what Winehouse means by this. But trust me, whatever one does imagine it will assuredly not be what Amy Winehouse had in mind. Amy Winehouse is...Amy Winehouse.

When will Blake Fielder-Civil get out of incarceration?