Return to the Twenty-First Century

On October 26, 2007, two events took place that would change the course of history as we know it. Paris Hilton went forward with her decision to be cryonically preserved so that she could wake up near the middle of the twenty-second century. While simultaneously, thousands of miles away, Superman donned his red briefs over his blue tights and began to fly swiftly around the Earth, into the future, to discover whether some little girl who was rescued from a bear attack would grow into a ridiculously hot chick in fifteen years. But things went terribly wrong...

Both Paris Hilton and Superman find that they have arrived much farther into the future than they originally planned to travel. They find that they have travelled all the way to the year 2627. Hilton discovers that while her mind has not aged, her body has - by 620 years. And Superman discovers that he has arrived in a time and place where the laws of physics cannot be violated. The two join forces in their quest to return to the twenty-first century...

Chapter I - Arrival in 2627

Clinton Township, Michigan - A lab technician momentarily nods off while monitoring the patients in suspended animation. In those brief minutes, the liquid nitrogen level preserving one of the inhabitants drops to a dangerously low level. While there are alarms in place to alert the workers of such a condition, things go terribly awry. Inside the containment unit, Resident #61181991 slowly begins to move her eyelids...

Houston, Texas - High above the heads of those going about their business in Houston, an object streaking through the sky begins to slow down. Houston, the home of the US space program, is used to seeing objects flying through the air, but this one is a little different. This flying object is blue, and if you are able to move your head especially fast, you might see a bit of a red speckle...

Clinton Township, Michigan - Waking up can be a disorienting experience on any occasion, and waking from a coma, needless to say, is significantly more intense. But comas rarely last more than five weeks. Just think of waking from a coma that lasts just a bit longer, a coma that lasts 620 years. That's what it was like when Paris Hilton stepped out her suspension chamber, and it was not long before she stumbled past a chamber where another resident slept and caught a glimpse of her reflection. She let out a horrified scream...

Houston, Texas - Slowing ever more, and finally coming to a halt while descending to the ground level, it becomes clear that there is something strangely familiar about this red and blue "object." Or at least if this was when this traveler had intended to touch down, there would have been several who would have recognized him. But the man named Kal-El at birth had erred slightly in his time travel. He would soon realize that he has traveled 605 years further in the future than his intention. When the first people saw him land wearing red briefs over blue tights, there was nothing they could do but laugh hysterically...

To be continued...