Oh the Humanity

So I came across this story, and needless to say, I'm outraged. All people should be as outraged as I am because what has this world come to when parents cannot take their children to Hannah Montana concerts without paying exorbitant prices? But before going any further in this discussion, there is something very troubling that I noticed that is largely unrelated to the subject of the article. In the current form of the article, in creating the plural of the term attorney general, the author chose to write attorney generals. This is absolutely inexcusable since the noun in the term is attorney and thus the plural is properly formed as attorneys general. Okay, there, I'm done whining about grammatical errors (and by the way, errors like the one discussed really irk me to no end) and can get back to the real point of the discussion...

This situation is quite comical to me because I did touch on this subject to a degree many months ago. Parents, I'm speaking to you directly here again. I know that you love your kids and you want to see them happy, but you have to protect your own interests at the same time. You know that most children's programming like Hannah Montana is atrocious and you can imagine that you would rather be doing just about anything other than sitting and watching the show with your child(ren). However, you realize that it's good to spend quality time with your kids and you keep your mouth shut while reluctantly sitting and watching. Right? Wrong! At least going forward you should not do this. Just follow my plan.

Purchase the DVDs of programming that you enjoyed as a kid, but making certain it is actually "children's programming" and not the adult videos that you took out of your parents' room each time they left you with the babysitter. As an example, I already have The Transformers and Batman: the Animated Series on DVD and these would be perfect candidates. Tell your kids that you have great new shows that your kids simply have to watch and produce the DVDs. When your kids complain, as they inevitably will, that they want to watch Hannah Montana, you have but one recourse, and this is very important: lie to them. Face it, you are already good at doing this, what with having convinced them that the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, leprechauns, and David Hasselhoff exist. So when your child complains to you, "I want to watch Hannah Montana," say to her/him, "Stop complaining and watch The Transformers, otherwise Santa won't bring you any presents for Christmas." And then on Christmas, when your kids open their presents, see that they have received Transformers toys when they had asked for Hannah Montana dolls, and complain about this fact, you can tell them that Santa thought that they wanted Transformers since they had enjoyed watching the DVDs so much. And then you'll have perfectly new Transformers toys that you can play with and you have avoided spending hundreds (if not thousands) of dollars on useless Hannah Montana tickets. Everyone's happy.